How Much Math Do You Remember from High School?

Holy crap, I was the worst math student ever.

I was a straight-A student everywhere else, but math was just the worst. Can you relate?

In high school I had all advanced classes except for switching to the most basic math class I could take. And before big exams I even had my uncle tutor me. Even so, I think I still only pulled off a B!

But my teachers kept saying, “Math is so important. You’ll really be thankful for this one day.”

Really?

Hmm. If I had a dime for every time I’ve needed the Pythagorean Theorem in my daily life…

But, now that you mention it, Mrs.Sayso, I could actually really use some information on how to stay sane when I can’t stand my boss. And, actually, now that I’m an adult, I’m getting sick quite often because I’m just not sure how to handle stress at work. Does Pythagorus have any words of wisdom for me there?

Oh, and thanks for the surprise that math actually isn’t what I need for real life at all. What I need is direction towards happiness, less stress and a better way to connect with my true self that will help me find a career I can stomach (and maybe a good calculator). What have you got in that category?

Sarcasm aside, I don’t blame my teachers or the system. That’s just the way it is. And, yes, math is important in some ways, but I believe practical skills from how to do one’s own taxes to stress management would be a more well-rounded education.

Thankfully, I think we’re moving towards this now and if it’s not yet in schools, there’s a lot more literature out there on being your best, happiest, true-to-your-gut self than when I was a teenager (this blog is one too, BTW).

As adults, we need to take responsibility; it’s like the definition of adult, really. So we take our education, our happiness and our joy into our own hands.

It’s not anyone else’s fault but our own – true!

But the good news? It’s also our prerogative to make changes to situations, schedules or routines that don’t make us completely in love with our lives every day.

Some of the big ones like job, career, relationship may have to wait while we figure out another way, but we will.

We’re big now. We can find ways to solve big problems. Pythagorus at least showed us that.
__

What are your biggest problems right now?
How are you figuring out another way?

This week could be a great new start. Instead of Sunday night blues, how about Sunday night planning? Ask yourself what an ideal week at your job would look like. What is one thing you can do to make something like that – or exactly that – happen?

I’d love to hear the plan and support you on the Being Thirties Facebook page. 

And If you’d like a good read on how to fall in love with your adult life, get your free copy of “Successful Goal-Making for 30-Somethings.” at ashewoodward.com

Or, if you’re ready to jump in today, let’s talk!
Get in touch at support@ashewoodward.com to discuss personal coaching for grown-ups on how to be a happy grown-up:)

 

I’m Starting to Hate ‘Millennials’ [WARNING: CONTAINS ADULT LANGUAGE]

You may or may not have noticed the radio silence on the blog. I don’t know if anyone is reading anymore, and I don’t really blame you if you aren’t.

I had to take a serious break from being part of this cultural obsession with generations and where we all fit and how we’re all going to deal with our different communication styles. And trust me, if you’re sick of reading the word, ‘millennial,’ then you can bet I’m sick of writing it.

There was no such word as ‘millennial,’ when I started writing the blog, if you can believe it. It’s hard to imagine now since it’s ubiquitous now in news stories and social media posts. But lately I’ve started to feel like I was drowning in the buzzword of the moment, unable to compete with the constant outpour of articles on millennials.

When I first started writing the blog it was because I was in a scary-dark place – depressed and looking for answers for what I wanted to do with my life and what it actually meant to be an adult woman with absolutely no plans for her future.

When I thought that I could explore these questions through writing, I got excited for the first time in months. I loved the idea that no one was really talking about the fact that the game of being an adult has totally changed from only ten years ago and I wanted to explore it hard – I also really needed to because I desperately needed those answers for myself.

Why is everything more difficult, more expensive, more challenging, more draining, and more shitty than I ever imagined? Is everyone else getting this joke but me? Am I the only one who feels like her body is a grave misrepresentation of the scared little girl inside?

Then, I guess, because I write about thirty-somethings, my friends and family started sending me videos, articles and social media posts about the latest articles with the buzzword ‘millennial’ in the headline, thinking that this is what I’m looking for.

And yes, sometimes the topic overlaps – some millennials are now in their thirties, some are GenX and some are caught somewhere between. But really (and I must be clear here): I don’t give a fuck about what generation anyone comes from – every generation of this century, I believe (and maybe beyond that) will have a specific struggle as they transition from twenties to thirties because of the way Western society is currently set up.

… And besides journalists and marketing specialists, I don’t think anyone else really does either.

And I’m so sick of the word, the concept and the fact that every writer and their mother thinks they know how to classify the millennial mind and who millennials really are, what they want and how they behave. It’s just so stupid.

The irony is that millennials are all about breaking down labels and accepting differences, but we’re forcing them to be categorized and stereotyped every step of the way, just to impress Google.

It’s also ineffective. I can’t believe we’re spending so much time reading the articles on this instead of getting our hands dirty and just talking to the young people we work with.

Sure millennials grew up in a different time and technology makes them seem more separate and new, but isn’t every generation new, wide-eyed and full of hopeful ideologies? Didn’t the flower children of the seventies spark the same interest and become a movement that helped us all evolve into a more loving and accepting society?

Millennials are just the next step; they’re taking it all a little further once again. That’s all. It’s not really that amazing, surprising, or really as fucking difficult as everyone says it is in all these articles.

“Millennials are so hard to please and understand”.

Garbage! I call serious bullshit on this.

They’re just people. They’re just younger fucking people. Talk to them like people and you’ll find out they’re actually pretty cool, happy to help and normal fucking humans – not an alien race of weirdos that the press makes them out to be, just for dramatic effect.

And really, the only reason ‘millennial’ is such as buzzword is because at any other time in history, writers and reporters would use words like ‘today in business’ and ‘nowadays,’ ‘current social behaviours.’ But these words are too mundane to be picked up by Google and improve your SEO ranking or get you featured in a hashtag search. The result is that we see ‘millennial’ get overused everywhere when really we’re just talking about how the world is progressing.

Personally, I really don’t give a shit what generation you come from – that’s not my question; that’s not where my curiosity leads me.

So, just to be clear: My questions are about adulthood – adulthood in the twenty-first century when apparently it’s okay to dress like a child, love cartoons, shoot each other with paint but also know how to pay down debt and navigate the new roles of male and female in the workplace, online, politics and even our own sexual relationships.

Send me your millennial articles if you must, but also look through them for yourself. Do you have a millennial in your life that you can ask if the article is on point or can you perhaps smell the bullshit wafting out of the desperate writer’s keyboard? Write about millennials, she says, that’s always a hit!

So this last month I just needed a break. I needed to step back and regroup with what my intent is here. I have no interest in the millennial hype. I have real questions that I think truly matter to people over thirty, and they have nothing to do with our top ten worst cellphone habits or our work ethic as it compares to the boomers.

Right now I’m working on the questions on my own. I want to know where our culture is really heading.

I want to know if higher education is about to die because of the fear of debt.

I want to talk about the pain of not being able to conceive, or the pain of not being able to have it all in a world full of endless options and over-stimulation.

I want to know what keeps you up at night and what really gets you going and motivated to go to the same crappy job every day (besides an Oprah quote clad in gold-glitter handwriting on a rose gold background).

There’s a lot of pain we’re all holding in and a lot we might also be chalking up to #firstworldproblems, but that’s bullshit too. It’s all relative.

What if we solve some of our pain here so we can be our best selves and help others; help the planet; help animals; help help help and love?

That’s what keeps me up at night before I close my iPad.That’s what I search for and what I think is worth writing about and talking about. #everyone.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on any or all of this. Are you feeling like the millennial craze is everywhere and just too much? Are you sick of how many times I used the word ‘millennial’ in this article seemingly to up my SEO (ironic, yes, but kind of unavoidable this time, really)? How’s your adult life going so far?

Mine’s ok. I’m working it out.

With hope and more fire,

Ashe

With my extra time away from posting, I revamped the site and the blog. What do you think? Leave a feedback comment on the Facebook page before JUNE 15th and receive a 30 minute FREE coaching call!

Check out the new website here: ashewoodward.com

What 35 REALLY Feels Like (and how to deal)…

Today is my birthday!

I’m 35, I keep repeating in my head, waiting for a shift, a boom, a bolt of lightening as maturity and endless wisdom kick in. But so far? Nothin.

I don’t quite know how I feel yet. I don’t know if I’m totally freaking out or if I’m really as cool as I say I am about being officially in my mid-thirties.

One thing that always haunts me is the phrase, Age is just a number. I’ve never really understood the whole reassuring aspect of it. Age is a number, yes, but how long can I go saying I’m in my thirties but feeling like I’m still eighteen? Eventually, shouldn’t I feel like a grown-up?

It reminds me of when the news tells me it’s going to be 10 degrees but feels like 15. The next day it could be 10 degrees again but feel like 8. There could be a whole week of 10-degree weather where not one day actually feels like 10 degrees, so we lose our baseline and start to forget what 10 degrees is actually like!

Okay, I’ll fess up, these digressions and rantings are all just a facade – a cover up because I don’t know how old I feel and I don’t know how I feel about it. Man, birthdays have a ways of making us oddly contemplative, don’t they? I guess I’ll just leave it alone until I’m sure.

Any time I start to go on these tangents I know I’m just procrastinating or distracting myself from a mess of feelings that I need to untangle. To do this (you can steal this technique too for when you catch yourself avoiding the BIG questions) is to start with what small things you know for sure.

For me, what I do know today is that I am truly grateful for all of my family and friends that came out and celebrated with me last night (and the impromptu animal balloon-making contest that topped it all off). The best part of the night for me though was when I looked around the room and totally blissed out at seeing all of my favourite people in one place.

I also know that I’m humbled, grateful and extremely privileged to have lived thirty-five years. In that time I’ve been surrounded by love, enjoyed endless opportunity and I’ve been blessed with good health and well-being; I’m a pretty lucky duck and I know it.

Some may say that this technique helps you go back to basics but I’m seeing now that I don’t see any of these things as basic at all. Love, health, family and friends are perhaps good fundamentals of a great life, but they’re not basic. Their fully enlightening, supercharged presence in our lives is a supreme and ethereal gift.

Talk about birthday reflection…Woah.

And on that note..time for cake!… (and more avoidance until the real impact kicks in…)

 

If you’ve got  some reflecting you  need to do, we should chat in a FREE consultation session. I’ve done my  fair share of reflection and gotten off-track, so I’ve developed proven ways to help  anyone get down with their bad (and good) self.  My one to  one coaching is about how in our thirties especially we are learning  to identify our true feelings and emotions and only  taking  action that speaks to our personal value system (AKA, the stuff people are talking  about when they say, “Just be yourself!… as if it’s so easy!)

Get in touch at support@ashewoodward.com

Or find more info at ashewoodward.com/coaching

We’re Not Lazy: A Response to Simon Sinek’s Millennial Thing

Most people define Millennials as those born in the early eighties. Being born in early 1982, I’m kind of on the cusp of GenX too and I often find myself offended by comments made about both generations. And as a mixed-generational woman it’s also hard to resolve that while  I love Nirvana and Soundgarden, I’m also addicted to posting food pics on Instagram. It’s a continuing inner battle.

But GenX has been accused of being a rather ‘meh’ generation — to use a Millennial phrase. It’s been said that we haven’t really contributed much to culture and, as a smaller segment of society, we lack the impact that the Boomers or the Millennials have.

Speaking of which, Millennials are all about the ‘impact’. Simon Sinek, in his recent viral video on Millennials in the workplace (watch HERE) almost sneers at this word in his interview, implying that we really don’t know the true meaning of it. He makes it sound like we like to throw the phrase ‘make and impact’ around but don’t know how to actually implement strategies to achieve it.

Sinek also says that Millennials are being “accused” by older generations as, “lazy, entitled and impatient.” He claims that we got here by being told that we are “special” and when we grow up we can have anything we want, which he says is a mistake in Boomer and GenX parenting strategies.

Sure this contributed, and Sinek is careful to say that this was no one’s fault. So why then does it still feel like we’re playing the blame game here?

Oh ya, because this isn’t the whole story. And maybe it’s also that we feel like saying, “Hey Simon, you’re not a Millennial so it does feel like you’re accusing us too.”

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But perhaps because of time constraints in the interview Sinek isn’t able to paint the fuller picture of all the motivations for why Millennials are ‘the way they are,’ but I personally think he missed the biggest one to point out:

It’s not that we’re lazy, we just DON’T WANT TO WORK TO DEATH!

We’ve seen the Boomers kill themselves, working 9–5 jobs, 5 days a week for years, just to reach retirement, where life can finally ‘begin’.

We’ve seen near-idyllic marriages fall part after twenty plus years.

And, we’ve seen GenX sit there, admittedly, like deer in the headlights, not knowing what this all means or what to do next and as a result and be paralyzed by fear, resulting in this ‘non-contributing generation.’

This then has resulted in more divorce, more stress, more ‘hard-work’ because maybe, just maybe, we thought we could stick to the old model if we just did it more and harder.

Enter the Millennials with our ‘lofty’ ideals of work less, live more . What a ‘lazy concept.’

Or is it a revolt and a rebellion that society needs?

Entitled? Yep. I agree with Sinek here. We were told we could have it, so now we want it. We’re an ambitious generation who know what we want. Is that so terrible?

We’re saying that working to live for the weekends isn’t cutting it. We’re saying that ya, let’s have beanbag chairs to start, but that’s only the beginning. And (duh!) it’s only a symbol for how we see the workplace as the first place paradigms need to shift.

We’re saying we accept that we live in a culture where we are what we do for a living. But we’re also asking if there’s a better way.

And maybe we are sitting around pondering the idea too much. Or maybe we are on our phones, playing Angry Birds, avoiding the weight of it all. But you can’t deny that we’re shaking it up – at least more than GenX. No offense.

It seems that everyone has seen this video and lately when I share what I do for a living and what I blog about, most people mention this clip and are more than eager to agree with Sinek, saying he, “hit it out of the park,” and everything is “right on the money”. They laugh in agreement at how they don’t understand how we can be so addicted to devices and be so unruly to manage. They look to me as if I’ll high-five them because someone is finally putting these entitled brats in their place.

But I don’t think that’s not what Sinek wants us to see. And I’m not high-fifing just yet.

Sinek is a fabulous leader and that’s what he’s most known for – teaching leadership skills. Undoubtedly, his voice will be an important one as Millennials get older and become the leaders of the generations that follow. But he’s not a Millennial. He’s right there with all the other leaders trying to figure out what will inspire Millennials to make all the impact we want to make which will inevitably help everyone, including the generations to come.

He’s struggling to figure out how to lead us as we’re trying to break the mold. And where he’s landed seems to be in a place of pointing out the very worst in us so we look in the mirror, while urging us to hold on to what’s important – relationships and patience.

Interestingly, a few websites describe him as an optimist, but one of the biggest things I have a problem with in his interview is his description of the, ‘best case scenario.’ He says that if we continue to exhibit impatience and a lack of relationship skills, we will become a very uninspired, neutral generation that is ‘fine’ with how things are in their life – from relationships to career, Millennials will stop asking for more and will give up on their ambitions. In other words, we will fully embrace a life of, ‘meh.’

I have to call BS on this. That’s a pretty pessimistic outlook, Mr. Sinek. It’s here that I wonder if he really isn’t being ironic afterall…

By challenging the 9-5 work day and the 5-day work week with our more entrepreneurial and non-profit spirits, we’ve already begun to shift an over 100 year old system. See, we got a little taste of the impact that’s possible and we want more.

And I don’t think our idealism and ambition will be worn down by nay-saying Boomers and GenXers. I think we’re just itching to be in those leadership positions so we might show you how it’s done.

Maybe we’re hard to manage because we don’t trust you. And maybe we don’t trust you because we’re addicted to our devices, or maybe it’s that you haven’t given us a reason to. I mean, why should I want to be like you and work tooth and nail for a thankless corporation that pollutes the environment? Or how can I really use the the words of wisdom from a mentor who started his career before computers were smaller than an entire room?

Sure we’re going to have to make adjustments to the ways technology has influenced our lives, especially our relationships, but we’re working on it. You may see our obsession with devices as a terrible addiction, but it’s also made us pretty industrious.

And our entitlement? Well, I personally think it’s dwarfed by our ingenuity and desire to add our flavour to the zeitgeist soup. Just watch.

Or maybe Sinek is right and we won’t figure it all out and we’ll continue not to know what we want. Then the next generation will be saddled with the responsibility of pleasing a generation who can’t articulate what needs to be done. Oh, how will they be able to impress these leaders who want you to work less but better?

I guess they’ll just have to up their game, raise the standards and forward humanity once again. 

So for that, and for being impatient, entitled and lazy: #sorrynotsorry.

What did YOU feel when you were watching the interview? Do you think Sinek is ‘on point’ or ‘out to lunch’? 

I’d love to hear more about what OUR GENERATION has to say as a defence or response to this.

Leave a comment here or on the Facebook page where you can chat with the whole

Being Thirties community!

And, as always, keep in touch by going to ashewoodward.com 

Are You in a Thankless Position?

When we’re growing up, we’re surrounded by praise from teachers, parents and even strangers who compliment our adorable cuteness.

And each time we hear we’ve done something right, we know we’re on the right track – our teacher says, “Keep up the good work,” and we know this means that if we keep on this way, we’ll pass.

Our parents may comment on our good use of manners and we learn how to treat people.

Our grandparents pinch our cheeks and we learn how to keep smiling.

But what about when we finally get out into the ‘real world’ and there’s no one to praise us or give us that direction?

What do we do when there’s no one to say that the decision we made was right or that the choices we’re making are smart, or that the work we’re doing will help us land that promotion?

If you’re one of the lucky ones, you have a good boss or supervisor who notices your hard work and is directing you towards success in your field. Same thing goes if you have a mentor or coach.

But if you’re like the rest of the population, you’re in a thankless job and you’re working to keep hope alive by finding little wins each day to brag about to your partner or dog when you come home.

If you’re in this category, you are the silent hero – going above and beyond your job, your home responsibilities and duties and no one really knows about all your hard work except you. While there is some honour in this, it’s not the best way to care for yourself or get ahead. Too much time spent feeling like you’re ‘guessing’ at the right thing to do often leads to stress, breakdowns and sad/funny meme creation.

But if you’re in a place where you feel like you’re alone and you really haven’t got a f&*king clue, let me tell ya – YOU’RE NOT ALONE. Not in an X-files creepy way, but in the way that even if it doesn’t seem like it, everyone is kinda winging it here.

The fact that these memes are posted and reposted is proof that we’re all feeling it. We all feel like we need more direction and praise. Unfortunately, this is the adult’s cross to bear.

But here’s the gist and what I truly believe: You need to trust and have faith in your 30+ years of life experience. Trust your intuition as being stronger than just a ‘guess’ because it has gotten you this far. And as you trust yourself more and more, your instincts will grow stronger like worked muscles and decisions become easier and the future seems brighter.

I think Henry Ford said it well when he said, “Quality is doing it right, even when no one is watching.”henry-ford-quotes-4

When we feel like we’re not being thanked or praised, it’s easy to want to give up. But integrity and a quality life is knowing that you are always doing your best, no matter what others notice.

And lastly, let me just say:

If you’re working to get to your dream in some pretty unglamourous ways – side hustles and side-side hustles

If you’re working to take care of you and your kids and you’re exhausted every night

If you’re working your butt off but still have no extra money at the end of the month

If you’re working at a business with no clients yet

If you’re doing everything you can with no results but keep going anyway cuz all you have is faith

If you’re writing a blog that no one leaves comments on…

I SEE YOU!

And I hope you feel it, because I mean it.

You may not KNOW what you’re doing, but still, you’re doing it! And that’s all you can always do.

Just keep going and know that the universe is watching. Your positive effort energy is never wasted because it always goes out into the world and turns into something else, probably for someone else’s benefit.

Have faith that even if things seem tough right now and it may seem like no one is rooting for you, please know that it isn’t true. Your small deeds matter to everyone because the fact that you keep doing it adds more magical grit and inspiration into the world.

I see you, thirtysomeone. I see you:)

If you’d like to learn more about integrity and the power of praise or tell me more about what you do as a silent hero, get in touch for a chat! support@ashewoodward.com.

And don’t wait to grab your FREE copy of

The Thirtysomething’s Guide to Successful Goal-making HERE

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Will You Ever Feel Like a Grownup?

Even though I know I’m 34 and, therefore, quite deep into my adult years, I somehow don’t often feel like I’m a grownup.

I think when I was younger I thought that being an adult would come with a sort of positivity and all-knowingness – not the kind your mother-in-law has, but the kind that comes from looking really cool in business attire and having your own briefcase.

I thought I would always know the answer and I’d be the kind of person who has complete self-confidence in every decision I made.

I had no idea how wrong I’d be…

I do have moments where I have the feeling of independence once in a while, but these moments are fleeting, making it more like an emotion than a general sense.

And just to remind me of how ungrownup I am, I got the hiccups yesterday and just couldn’t shake them. I held my breath, drank water upside down and even tried to scare myself by watching the first episode of Stranger Things.

Thankfully, they disappeared when I went to the bank later and I cleared up a mistake on my account. During that time I actually felt like a grownup; no hiccups, and completely cool. I think I fooled them.

But it made me realize that this feeling of being a grownup may not even really exist at all. Maybe it’s just something we imagine will feel different but never really does. Maybe all it is is an emotion that shows up only once and a while, out of the blue, kind of like the hiccups.

I started to think more about what it means to get the grownups…

I tend to get the grownups more when I’m at the bank, taking care of my future.

I feel the grownups when I’m driving somewhere I’ve never been and I figure it out.

I definitely feel them when I act like a bonehead and knock someone’s drink over and my first instinct isn’t to be embarrassed but to laugh at myself, apologize and replace it (which happened today).

I wonder if these moments will eventually get closer together and eventually meld into a fully-formed sense of adultness.

But talking with some of my elder relatives in the last while has pretty much assured me that it really never kicks in like you expect it to. They say it’s actually more like the hiccups and how they show up to remind you to take it slow and breathe.

In the same way, those adulting moments give us a quick glimpse of our adult life, and for a few moments we can feel like we’ve made it. These moments give you a chance in a quick glimpse to see how your life has progressed and is a little more sorted out than it used to be.

The trick, I think, is to take the moment in, but also be careful to not try too hard to hold on to it. Don’t fool yourself into thinking you have to make the feeling last.

It’ll be back some time soon.

In the meantime, we still have some growing up to do and we’re meant to really enjoy that part of the journey – the part that feels fun and unbound by time. The part where I still feel like a little girl when I give my dad a hug or when I play on the grass with my dogs.

When do you get the grownups and when and how do you let them go?

I’d love to hear in the comments or on Facebook.

And if you or someone you know is looking for more ways to feel the grownups, to really take charge of your adult life, get in touch! Find out more about working with me in one of my coaching programs at ashewoodward.com. Or get in touch at support@ashewoodward.com.

Our OLD Chums and How to Love Them

The list of reasons why it’s great to be in our thirties is pretty long, and I’m sure you know  I could ramble for hours about this being the most excellent decade of my life so far.

And, since you asked, some of my personal favourites are: knowing ourselves more fully, having experience in many many areas, wisdom, more confidence and, for some, a bigger who gives a F— attitude.

But where there’s light, there’s dark so like all things in life there is a dark side to thirtysomeone life. Some culprits include the seemingly never-ending stack of bills, likely identity crises, pressure to get married and have kids, and an ever-slowing metabolism, and the urge to be in our jammies by 8pm on Saturday nights, only to name a few of the great ones.

But today I want to stay positive and add one to the list that I’ve actually never thought of before and it occurred to me this weekend when I had a friend visit.

We met in our first year of university. We both lived on the all girl’s floor and it was a pretty tight community. However, she’s been the only oneI’ve really stayed in touch with.

Now, she lives a few hours and lots of traffic away, but we’ve managed a visit almost every year and we went to each others’ weddings. Not bad.

And then when I got thinking really about how impressive that is, I realized that I’ve known this chick since I was 19, and I can actually say that I have been friends with someone for 15 years!

And I was like, Holy crap that sounds like a long time!

But how amazing is that?

In high school we bond with our friends and feel like we’ll be friends forever. And maybe we will or maybe we won’t, but at the time it sure feels like we are true blue soul mates and yet we’ve only known each other for maybe a couple of years.

In our thirties, it’s possible to have had those trusted amigos in our lives for much, much longer, making those friendships even stronger and more meaningful.

I’m so grateful to have known many of my friends for many years – even if it does make me sounds incredibly old (especially when we can reminisce about mix tapes, Saturday morning cartoons, not having a cell phone until we were 20).

It’s also quite a humbling feeling to know that I’m sharing this journey with great people I’ve met along the way, and it’s amazing to be able to watch our lives ebb, flow, or even change completely.

It’s double crazy to even try to imagine the girls that met all those years ago are now these women –  still friends, but really different from who we used to be, in so many ways. In point of fact, we used to party at the campus bar ’til close, drinking the boys under the table.

This past weekend we had a healthy dinner of salmon and salad from my garden, drank some wine and hit the hay at 10:30pm, like wild women.

So, it all sounds great, but there’s always that risk of of falling out of touch over time. So how do we ensure our friendships stay friendships so we can retain all the bragging rights of being friends for decades?

The simplest way I can put it is this: make it a priority. If a friend is truly a friend and you value that person’s friendship even the slightest, you make sure you go to the birthday party that might be inconvenient. You make sure you meet for coffee when you haven’t spoken in six months. You go to the baby shower you resent going to, knowing that your friend will never buy your dog a toy or a cute outfit.

Secondly, as a priority, make sure you are THERE – phone off (potentially), kids at the babysitter, and all your attention is on the other person.

It sounds like a strict regimen, but you will never deny that it is all worth it and so much more important that you had even thought when you were first making plans.

And it IS important. So when we do get the feeling that we’re really ‘getting up there,’  I hope we have made the calls, made the trips, and we’ll end up in a place where we see a great group of forever friends right there with us.

If you or a forever friend is ready to step into your thirties with confidence and success, I’d love to chat! Find out more at ashewoodward.com or email me directly at support@ashewoodward.com.