When we’re growing up, we’re surrounded by praise from teachers, parents and even strangers who compliment our adorable cuteness.
And each time we hear we’ve done something right, we know we’re on the right track – our teacher says, “Keep up the good work,” and we know this means that if we keep on this way, we’ll pass.
Our parents may comment on our good use of manners and we learn how to treat people.
Our grandparents pinch our cheeks and we learn how to keep smiling.
But what about when we finally get out into the ‘real world’ and there’s no one to praise us or give us that direction?
What do we do when there’s no one to say that the decision we made was right or that the choices we’re making are smart, or that the work we’re doing will help us land that promotion?
If you’re one of the lucky ones, you have a good boss or supervisor who notices your hard work and is directing you towards success in your field. Same thing goes if you have a mentor or coach.
But if you’re like the rest of the population, you’re in a thankless job and you’re working to keep hope alive by finding little wins each day to brag about to your partner or dog when you come home.
If you’re in this category, you are the silent hero – going above and beyond your job, your home responsibilities and duties and no one really knows about all your hard work except you. While there is some honour in this, it’s not the best way to care for yourself or get ahead. Too much time spent feeling like you’re ‘guessing’ at the right thing to do often leads to stress, breakdowns and sad/funny meme creation.
But if you’re in a place where you feel like you’re alone and you really haven’t got a f&*king clue, let me tell ya – YOU’RE NOT ALONE. Not in an X-files creepy way, but in the way that even if it doesn’t seem like it, everyone is kinda winging it here.
The fact that these memes are posted and reposted is proof that we’re all feeling it. We all feel like we need more direction and praise. Unfortunately, this is the adult’s cross to bear.
But here’s the gist and what I truly believe: You need to trust and have faith in your 30+ years of life experience. Trust your intuition as being stronger than just a ‘guess’ because it has gotten you this far. And as you trust yourself more and more, your instincts will grow stronger like worked muscles and decisions become easier and the future seems brighter.
I think Henry Ford said it well when he said, “Quality is doing it right, even when no one is watching.”
When we feel like we’re not being thanked or praised, it’s easy to want to give up. But integrity and a quality life is knowing that you are always doing your best, no matter what others notice.
And lastly, let me just say:
If you’re working to get to your dream in some pretty unglamourous ways – side hustles and side-side hustles
If you’re working to take care of you and your kids and you’re exhausted every night
If you’re working your butt off but still have no extra money at the end of the month
If you’re working at a business with no clients yet
If you’re doing everything you can with no results but keep going anyway cuz all you have is faith
If you’re writing a blog that no one leaves comments on…
I SEE YOU!
And I hope you feel it, because I mean it.
You may not KNOW what you’re doing, but still, you’re doing it! And that’s all you can always do.
Just keep going and know that the universe is watching. Your positive effort energy is never wasted because it always goes out into the world and turns into something else, probably for someone else’s benefit.
Have faith that even if things seem tough right now and it may seem like no one is rooting for you, please know that it isn’t true. Your small deeds matter to everyone because the fact that you keep doing it adds more magical grit and inspiration into the world.
I see you, thirtysomeone. I see you:)
If you’d like to learn more about integrity and the power of praise or tell me more about what you do as a silent hero, get in touch for a chat! firstname.lastname@example.org.
And don’t wait to grab your FREE copy of
The Thirtysomething’s Guide to Successful Goal-making HERE