I wish I knew in my twenties what I know now.
I hear it all the time – from friends, clients, even myself at times. This week it even came up in my interview with Scott from Power of Perception. We both agreed it’s fun to indulge in imagining the past a little bit better with some input from our wiser selves. Oh if we could just do it over!
It’s frustrating sometimes when you think about it and the urge can be pretty great – especially when you think about embarrassing moments or times when you could go back and save a little face. It truly is such an attractive concept: taking the wisdom we’ve gained and going back to all the difficult times to re-do them with more grace, more composure and maybe some better-chosen choice words.
It’s enough to make us literally stop, think and dream about the times we’d like to correct or experience again. And for thirtysomethings I think it’s even more pronounced because, after all, we are the Back to the Future generation!
You could retake exams with your practiced skills, amazing your parents and teachers and getting a full scholarship to the university of your choice. Or maybe you even get a great job right out of high school.
Or, you might want to go back to talk to your crush, knowing now that it doesn’t phase you if he or she laughs in your face because you’ve grown a thicker skin. You could even go back and face your bully, knowing now exactly what to say to brim ‘em down.
You might even be the type to go even further back and buy some Apple stock, invent Facebook, or bet on the Super Bowl.
Personally, I’d go back to save myself a lot of time by starting my business right out of university. Sure, the Internet wasn’t so great back then, which would make it harder to get exposure and do international business. But I wonder if I’d be further ahead than I am now in achieving my goals and to-dos on my bucket list. *sigh.
But the more I think on it, I’m not so crazy about repeating high school or university. It took a lot of time and I was stressed, tired and unhealthy for most of it.
I also have enough trouble with getting exposure for what I do with the Internet the way that it is today so I don’t think I’d enjoy going back to a time when things would be more difficult. Even with the wisdom I’ve gained, I don’t think it’s such a great idea.
I’d also have to be very careful to make sure I did certain things so that I still meet my husband and all the great friends I’ve met along the way. A couple different moves and I can see a lot of great times I’d miss.
So as tempting as it is to send our wiser selves back to correct the past, isn’t it more satisfying to know that through all of that, you still became you- the wise person you have so much confidence in?
Isn’t it amazing that we believe that we now have the confidence to go back to those situations and crush them?
So the thing we need to take away from this is remembering that you’re that person now – those powers are at your disposal here in the present. You’re that person dealing with whatever problems you’re facing. And if you have the confidence to send yourself back to correct those wrongs, you must have the confidence in your present self.
So what are you going to do, wise one?
The problems may look different than they did in high school, but think of how much more capable you see yourself as now. You should be confident that your experience and wisdom will allow you to find a way to solve any problem you’re facing.
Sure, you don’t know the outcomes but the great thing about being in our thirties is that we really get to know ourselves. We know how problems happen and get handled in our lives by now if we’re willing to look.
Here’s what I mean:
Let’s say you’re wanting something right now. Let’s say it’s a big one.
Looking back, I’m sure you’ve wanted something before and got it. Find that situation and analyze it. Write it out and take a look.
What were you thinking? What action were you taking? Whose advise did you heed?
In other words, how did you get what you wanted in the past? And, furthermore, how can you use what you’ve learned since then to get what you want and more in the present and the future?
The great thing about being where we are in our thirties is that, yes, we have a lot of experience to draw from. But it’s useless dreaming about taking it backwards. Life is happening in front of you – going forward.
So how are you going to use your wisdom to make life easier for you in the here and now and beyond?
What makes you so much wiser now? What makes you so much different than you used to be?
And use that. And work it!
If you’re unsure about how to use your skills and experience to help you with decisions, problems or manifesting your dreams, get in touch for personalized coaching. I’d love to work with you to uncover your unique superpowers that will lead you to achieve your goals in the present and beyond. Go to ashewoodward.com for how to get started.